Tough Times

“A diamond is a chunk of coal that did well under pressure.” – Henry Kissinger


We are operating our lives in a new pressure cooker lately.  I hope you and your family have found at least a semi-comfortable new normal.  However, as the prior quote attests, there is a wide disparity between doing well…or not…under pressure.  So here are some thoughts on something that may be the most integral component to how well your family responds to this pressure…that integral component is your marriage.

Your marriage will likely get better or worse from this situation.  There’s really not a stay-the-same option when conditions change in a huge way. 

I’ve never written anything of this exact nature before, but none of us has ever experienced times like this before either, so here goes with some new stuff!

I feel it’s safe to say that if the subject of household finances hasn’t been a regular topic in your home then you are in the minority.  That’s stressful enough, let alone having the kids at home 24/7, maybe working from home, and overall just figuring out how to run your household in these conditions. 

Hopefully you’ve been able to spend more time with your kids, which is something they will remember distinctly.  However, if you’re anything like my wife and I, while we’ve been in the same house a lot lately, we’ve not really been connected at all. 

While we homeschool our 8 and 5 year-old and that hasn’t changed, our homeschool co-op group is cancelled, and my wife and kids are home ALL THE TIME.  I never realized how many meet-ups and field trips they normally kept until it all stopped.  And despite not having TAT training, I’m working more than ever between social media, emails, advertising, crunching numbers, learning government assistance options, and negotiating my rental situation.  I’m also doing a lot of back-burner projects in the building which you will immediately notice when we open back up.

So set aside some time to make your marriage a priority.  You will be able to better navigate these stormy waters feeling connected to your spouse.  It’s definitely think outside-the-box time because arranging a babysitter and going out for drinks and dinner is not an option.  Set the kids up with some self-sufficient activity and make them leave you alone…this will be extremely welcomed by teenagers.

Do something that makes you recall why you got married.  We recently celebrated our 14th anniversary and watched our wedding video.  Besides streaming our church on Sundays, it’s the best thing I’ve watched in weeks…you can only take so much of the news and be healthy.

Prioritize your spouse and help your marriage come out of this as a diamond.

Stay safe and have faith,


Dan Bessetti

Owner & Head Coach


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